Derek
Nautical Twilight
[M0:0]The Torch is Passed
Posts: 300
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Post by Derek on Oct 27, 2009 13:38:05 GMT -5
Ive got 20 PMs on my "Afterglow" page, and she was the first to PM me. I kinda felt she was trying to protect me or something, i can't really get into it because i don't really understand from what.
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Post by Jessie on Oct 27, 2009 14:05:28 GMT -5
She was the ONLY person who I have ever gotten "into it" with here, and when we did numerous people PM'ed me in support and understanding.
She made me feel horrible because I love The Afterglow, it's one of my few social outlets, and I don't want to have any issues here that are negative.
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Agent Starling
Nautical Twilight
[M0:56]World, what lessons you prepare for us, even in the leafless winter, even in the ashy city.
Posts: 342
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Post by Agent Starling on Oct 27, 2009 14:35:38 GMT -5
With over 3,000 posts orangejasmine was a very active and committed member of this community. Whatever the reason for her departure, I think this is a loss for The Afterglow. I've only been around here for a few months and OJ was the person with whom I had developed the strongest bond. I'm really going to miss her. I'm surprised by the banning, but as I don't have the full view of what happened, I have no opinion as to whether the decision was the right one or not. I'm sure it was a difficult one to make.
Afterglow Staff, I'm not sure what kind of warnings you give to those who are about to be banned? I guess that's what I'd like to have clarified if possible.
Just an idea...maybe the rules could be updated to include the text of a final warning form-message, something informing a wayward glower in clear, objective language that a line has been crossed and that s/he must step back and chill out before continuing any public or private conversations on The Afterglow. A form message might be easier to send and easier to receive - it's a step back from difficult personal emotions...a step in the right direction in many arguments.
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Post by Jessie on Oct 27, 2009 14:41:34 GMT -5
Deb gave her a warning. She clearly said, to everyone, that the next person who starts a fight will be banned.
It was every day, every day there was an argument.
I remember one thread where someone had just got back from a show and stated that it sounded like Tori had a cold. OJ then proceeded to fight her/him on that.
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Post by She-Ra Winehouse on Oct 27, 2009 15:02:37 GMT -5
Deb gave her a warning. She clearly said, to everyone, that the next person who starts a fight will be banned. Also true. Like I said, we don't know the exchanges between Deb and OJ behind the scenes, but I know Deb and I know Tom. If they say there was a good reason to ban her, I believe them. And maybe she was given 20warnings in PM's? We don't know these things. I don't see my point of view as favoritism, but it is true I know Deb and Tom better. I don't think you can even get Deb to kill a fly if you kidnapped her and forced her to do it. (maybe we should try that next time ) What's done is done, I believe there was a fair reason, I don't need to know that reason, I trust Deb, Mel, Saar and Tom to know what they do around here. The End
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Post by Saar°berry on Oct 27, 2009 18:11:54 GMT -5
As the mother of this forum, I'll put my last two cents in here. I believe we've only banned 4 people in 'Glows history. Which is NOTHING. We have NEVER banned anyone without warning or without discussing it with the person in question. We have NEVER banned a person without a valid reason. I don't see why we should put out even more rules. I think the rules are plain and simple: respect. And that's a two way thing. This is a forum for discussions, but like I've said before, they do not equal fights. Yes sure, in real life it's easier, 'cos of the facial expressions and whatnot, but still, we've done it all these years without it here and we're doing fine. Just think before you write something down; respect someone elses opinion, surely that's not that hard?! Yes sure OJ was a sweet girl and I understand a lot of you had a good relationship with her, and it's always sad when we have to say goodbye to people, but that's life unfortunately. There was stuff going on thru pm's, so most of you aren't seeing the whole picture. I am behind my people here. I for one haven't been around much, 'cos I'm going thru a difficult patch right now and left my baby with people I trust, mainly Deb. She has been doing SO much for this forum and the people here. It's sad to read people are giving her such a hard time with this decision. I'm actually quite dissapointed in some reactions here. She made a decision for this board, for the people... for peace and for the wellbeing of the 'Glow. I hope you guys can trust and respect this decision. I know most of you guys know Deb longer than OJ, I don't think any of you think she would do this banning, 'cos of personal feelings. I also want to add that no decision is ever made by one person here. We always discuss issues behind the scenes with all the mods/admins. This is a very 'open' forum, which is good. You guys have a lot of say. But there needs to be trust towards the admins/mods. We only do what's best for everyone and this place here. We never single out anyone without reason.
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Post by Belinda on Oct 27, 2009 21:18:30 GMT -5
if people have such a good relationship with her as they say id think you would have contact outside of here. I have seen it on many forums someone leaves and people are all we were such good friends now i cant talk to her anymore. Anyone here i consider a friend i have other ways to contact them other than on the board
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Post by deborah77 on Oct 28, 2009 0:54:44 GMT -5
Thanks everyone for giving your opinion. I don't want to go into discussing it all again because i'm really hurt by the whole thing but i also don't want you to think i don't care about comments made so : Agent starling, you were talking about warning, this is what i posted in that thread, doesn't that sound clear enough to you ? Ok people , i don't appreciate the tone in this thread. i'm annoyed that once again people get into a fight. SO PLEASE LET IT GO FOR NOW.
THE NEXT PERSON THAT I FIND FIGHTING ON THE AFTERGLOW WILL BE DIRECTLY BANNED AND I'M NOT JOKING HERE
Orangejasmine, it's nice that you like to debate things with other afterglowers but i think you are constantly trying to push people to agree with you even if you don't quite realise it and that certainly creates tension.
Religion topics are always very tacky because people take those to heart so please people be respectful to others beliefs in your posts Now, i think i'm understanding enough so if someone gets a warning and sends me a pm to say they are sorry and that they won't do it again, no banning will ever happen. But when you see my warning and starts sending me pms after pms, attacking me and basically all the people that posted in that thread, there is a problem for me, especially when it's not the first time it happens. End of the story
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Post by Jupiter's Widow on Oct 28, 2009 15:20:29 GMT -5
I have nothing else to add since the others said it so well. But I believe the right decision was made, even if it seems harsh to those who don't have the full picture (being the PMs Deborah received as well) and yes, she was warned on the board and it was discussed further in a PM. Banning here rarely happens and there is always a reason for it and the mods and admins always discuss it thoroughly and it is never done just for the sake of it or taken lightly. And I truly have added nothing worthwhile. There really aren't many rules here. It pretty much boils down to "Don't request officially released music and no fighting or drama". Pretty simple to follow.
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Post by deborah77 on Oct 28, 2009 15:45:00 GMT -5
I don't see my point of view as favoritism, but it is true I know Deb and Tom better. I don't think you can even get Deb to kill a fly if you kidnapped her and forced her to do it. (maybe we should try that next time ) i forgot to post about this...That was so cute Shireen...*just picturing the scene next time we meet-up*
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Post by She-Ra Winehouse on Oct 28, 2009 17:11:20 GMT -5
Quick question: anyone have a fly somewhere I can use in an experiment? And ermm.. anyone have a pair of handcuffs I can borrow? (I can't tell you what it's for.. it's soopersekret)
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Post by Jessie on Oct 28, 2009 17:18:45 GMT -5
I have some handcuffs!
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Post by She-Ra Winehouse on Oct 28, 2009 17:20:15 GMT -5
Send them this way then...
*plots*
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Post by deborah77 on Oct 28, 2009 17:23:55 GMT -5
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Post by Peeping Tommi on Oct 28, 2009 17:24:50 GMT -5
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